Nothing Inside
by FullDarkNoLight
Summary: When Katniss dies Peeta reflects back on their life together and wishes that he could be free again. Partially drabbles. Everlark Twoshot Au Modern day. Rated T to be safe.
1. Nothing Inside

**Another contest Oneshot. Don't worry I'm still working on all my other stories.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games**

* * *

Peeta reached for the bottle again, taking a swig from its crystal depths. This is what his life had become, one meaningless swirl of amber liquid. He was trapped in a sequence of mourning, then numbness. With each sip the glass bottle made a satisfying swish, slowly draining.

He was so stuck without her. He had no reason to leave the awkward comfort of his living room; she was gone. He was confined within himself, unable to move forward, trapped in his past.

He slammed the bottle down, gently admiring the empty crystal with disdain. He didn't know what to do anymore. Urging himself on, he took a tentative step up off his seat, making his way to the kitchen.

He knew the second bottle was in the cupboard above the fridge, awaiting him peacefully.

_"You've got a secret stash," he teased, pulling on her brown locks playfully._

_"Shut up," she said firmly. "It's only for special occasions." _

_He chuckled softly, a cheeky grin finding its way to his face. "Does today count?" _

_She just smiled, giving him a light peck on the lips. "Nope,"_

Peeta stepped up to the fridge, finding the picture on the door. His brow furrowed at the sight, and he ran his hand down the bright colours. It wasn't fair; she was gone and he was trapped here, all alone. He admired the drawing for a moment, then pulled it off the shiny surface, crumpling it in his fist. The tears he had been holding back finally flowed freely. The drawing represented everything he'd lost; it was just one more thing holding him in place.

_"What's this?" he asked, his voice light. _

_She lifted an eyebrow knowingly, raising a hand to trace the crayon drawing. "Maddie from across the street drew it. She said that it's you, and me, and the little girl that we are going to have that she is very excited about babysitting"_

_The smile dropped from his face, and he looked at her in shock._

_"Katniss?" he asked hopefully, looking deep into her eyes._

_A smile broke out on her face, and she covered it with her hand, nodding swiftly. _

_He gasped, grabbing her and twirling her in his arms. "She's gonna be beautiful," he whispered, holding her tightly. "Our little Sarah…"_

He banged his fist against the counter, attempting to release some of his anger. His Katniss was gone, along with their little girl. He dropped the bottle, listening to the sickening crash as it hit the tile. What was he living for anyways? She had been all that mattered, all that kept him moving. Now he was trapped in his sorrow.

His feet moved along the empty hallway, taking him to the cabinet. He opened it up, finding the desired reward.

_"Katniss Everdeen, my wife, meant everything to me." He choked on his words, unable to get the picture of her lifeless body out of his mind. "She was the reason that I got up in the morning, the reason that I bothered with a job, and house. She was my home. Being with her exhilarating; she was freedom, dancing in the wind." He looked down at his hands, pausing a moment. "I don't know what I'm gonna do without her, and our daughter. She was my life…"_

Peeta unscrewed the cap of the yellow bottle solemnly, dumping the ivory capsules out onto the counter. He was tired, tired of being alone, tired of being sad; he was tired of being stuck. He didn't know who he was anymore; nothing mattered without her.

His hand shook as he brought it to his mouth, tipping his palm gloomily.

He was ready to be free again.

_Peeta held her hand as she ran, tugging him around violently. Her hair blew like fire in the find, engulfing the world in flames. She pulled him down to the ground, forcing him to lie down beside her in the grass. _

_She looked at him intensely, her warm hazel eyes on his. She refused to loosen her grasp on his hand, and he held on just as tightly. _

_"Peeta?" she asked, gazing up at the cloudless sky in awe._

_"Yes?"_

_"I think this is what it means to be free," _

_And he couldn't help but agree. _


	2. When The World Caught Fire

**Hey guys, so I was asked by TributeAndProud to continue this, so I can explain a little bit of what happened to Katniss. I've always had a bit of an idea, and this is what came out of it. Unfortunately, it turned out similar to another story I wrote that I haven't posted yet. Oh well...**

**This will probably be the last part to this, unless I can think of more. I almost split this up into chapters, but I thought that the short drabbles fit the story better. I might put a short epilogue from Prim's perspective if you guys want though. **

**Disclaimer: I still wish I owned it... Too bad I don't. And let's face it, if I owned the Hunger Games, I would have killed off either Katniss or Peeta to make it more tragic than it already was. **

* * *

Peeta leaned over the bed, placing a hand on his wife's slightly swollen belly. He smiled as he felt a flutter, beginning to hum softly.

Hush little baby, don't say a word

Momma's gonna buy you a mockingbird

He didn't know how it was possible to love someone he'd never even met so much. Yet still, his heart raced every time he felt a kick. His little girl was right there, so close.

He could picture her already, tiny chubby arms, and an infectious smile. Her footsteps as gentle as a late night drizzle of rain.

She was perfect, golden and glowing, a unique mix of both her parents. She was everything that he'd ever wanted.

He finished his song, moving up to place a delicate kiss on Katniss's forehead.

He couldn't wait to meet his daughter.

* * *

Katniss Everdeen had never planned on having children.

Mind you, she'd never planned on falling in love, and getting married either.

Somehow, Peeta Mellark changed everything.

He brought a smile to her face, maybe even a chuckle to her lips. He lit up the room like a flame, determined to make everyone happy.

He sure did make her happy.

She watched him slave away to make sure that his daughter would want for nothing, would never feel how much an empty belly could hurt, and most of all, he made sure she would always be surrounded by love.

She couldn't believe how lucky her baby girl was to have him for a father.

* * *

Peeta wasn't there the night she lost the baby.

He was picking up an extra shift at the restaurant, immediately volunteering to clean and close-up shop.

They'd been forced to cut corners, to watch every dollar spent. He'd even sold his father's old truck: a gift for his twenty-first birthday.

It had been worth it though; he would have done anything to keep his daughter safe.

His neighbor, Madge Hawthorne was the one that called him, her voice blurring into a muddle of words. Only one phrase was within his comprehension.

Katniss lost the baby...

He drove to the hospital in a frenzy, tears obstructing his vision. He couldn't even face it. Everything he'd done had been for nothing.

His little girl was gone.

* * *

She started digging through his drawer, searching for his only formal attire, a pale blue dress shirt that brought out the colour of his eyes. Instead, she found the worn plaid shirt that she'd worn continuously during her pregnancy.

That was enough to make her break down.

She clutched the shirt close, hating the now flat plane of her stomach. It mocked her, reminding her of the daughter that fell from her grasp too easily.

She'd been just out of reach.

Katniss walked down the hallway in a trance, making it to the threatening, closed door.

She hadn't been in there since it happened.

She pushed the door open, listening to the awful creaking noise. Somehow, the warm orange room had been drained of colour, as if turning gray the moment it lost its future occupant.

The shadow of the baby mobile danced on the wall, the sparrows stuck in a ceaseless motion, with no child to entertain.

Peeta had made it himself, along with the neat wooden crib. He'd prepared so much for the child.

They'd finally been ready.

Katniss fell to her knees, finding herself sobbing uncontrollably. Why did it happen? Why had she been taken away from them?

She just wanted to stop hurting.

* * *

Peeta was hurting too.

He drove away from the house that held so many hopes and dreams, leaving his wife to cry alone.

He wasn't sure he would be able to compose himself in front of her. Just a glance her way could bring him to tears, and he couldn't put that kind of burden on her.

She shouldn't have to know how much it hurt him.

He'd wanted nothing more than a child, but it seemed God couldn't even grant that wish.

He stepped out of the car, slamming the door behind him. He'd stopped out on the bridge, the moon shining bright.

Looking over the edge, he watched the water swirl beneath him, beckoning for him to join it in an elegant dance.

He contemplated for just a moment what it would be like to tumble over the edge and not have to feel anymore.

He would stop hurting.

A moment later he snapped out of his trance. How could he even think of doing something so selfish?

His wife was isolated at home, concealing her grief while he even dared to think of leaving her alone forever. What kind of a man would do that?

He was selfish, and cowardly, and weak.

He realized then, that he'd never been fit to be a father.

* * *

Her first day back on the job was rough.

She was stuck behind a desk, her thoughts constantly lingering to the family that she would never have.

Was it her fault?

Had she done something wrong to cause this catastrophe?

Her husband had grown away from her, punishing himself for a crime he didn't commit. He was distant, as if afraid that he might break her if he came too close.

Too bad she was already broken.

The one thing she'd never wanted had become the thing she loved the most, but now she'd lost that.

What else did she have to lose?

She tapped the end of her pen on her desk, completely lost in thought.

The fire started down below, but it moved upwards. People started running, frantically trying to escape the burning building.

She didn't even try to leave.

She just sat at her desk, realizing that it might just be easier to give up.

She became the girl on fire and Peeta Mellark's world was engulfed in flames.


End file.
